Another one bites the dust,,,could this marriage be saved?

So, it's happened again. We have some friends who have been together for decades...I mean they have made some history together over the years and are well known and liked in the community. As relationships often do, this one seemed to begin to grow cold.

Soon there was no intimacy, both sexual and relation ship types of intimacy. A coldness began creeping in and so another lady friend suggested to the spouse that may Roger (we will call him that) might be into pornography.

" NO WAY!" Said our spouse Tory, "porn has never been in our house." But her friend persisted and one early morning while Roger was out deer hunting she took a look at his laptop. She typed in Ctrl H and the history popped up. Pages and pages of porn sites. Hundreds of them. Chat rooms, web cams. Everything. Tory was stunned and deeply wounded.

Later that day, after Roger came home Tory confronted him at which time he came clean. He said he didn't know how he even got started with it but it was so easy to access and it was free that he just found himself sinking into it. Roger begged her forgiveness, promising that he would quit going to porn sites...but he didn't.

Two weeks later a check of his history showed that he was back at it. More apologies, more forgiveness, more promised...followed by more porn. Over a period of six months the cycle repeated itself, promises and lies, lies and more lies.

Finally Tory had had enough and made the ultimatum. Either they got counseling or he was going to have to get out...so he left.

The addictive power of porn was so outrageously string that Roger chose his porn over his wife and twenty years of history. He refused to talk to a counselor or anything. He just got out.

Porn use is destroying relationships at a staggering rate. Families are being broken up by what people describe as harmless.

Since 1998 after nearly falling into this same trap I began to hunt for solutions for porn use by adults. I came up with a combination of a filtering technology and accountability reporting called Wisechoice.net. Rather than a solution designed for guarding children, Wisechoice is designed to protect husbands and marriages from porn. The addictive properties are such that putting a wall around ones self is often the only way short of getting rid of the computer entirely and it is effective. I would suggest checking our solution out or one of the other filters available.

Thanks for reading this and if you have questions then email me at ned@wisechoice.net and we can talk it over.

He never could have imagined...

"It was like a moth attracted to a light bulb," Simaluk told Regina Provincial Court Judge Bruce Henning on Friday. "He just has no idea why he did it."  This was a defense lawyer explaining to the judge why Nels Soerenson came to possess a huge library of child porn on his computer

What an apt discription. A moth to a light bulb, not only is the moth attracted to the bulb but he keeps on hitting it until he finally dies. In the case of Mr. Sorenson he will spend the next 15 months in prison,In addition, "Among conditions of the probation order are that Soerensen not attend public places frequented by children or communicate with youths under 16 unless an informed adult is present; not possess computers or electronic devices that can access the Internet; not possess pornography; allow those monitoring him to see the bills and statements from his telecommunications provider; submit to searches by police up to three times per month; not live in a place where he has unrestricted access to a computer; and take sex offender assessment and/or treatment as directed. A separate order, to be imposed for six years, prevents him from working or volunteering in a capacity that places him in a position of trust or authority over children and restricts him from communicating with youths on the Internet

 

Prior to his arrest this 44 year old man was known for his love of playing chess! He had no criminal record. I cannot tell from the news account if he is married or has children, but if he does then I would suggest that he won't be married for long. If he is in a civic organization like Rotary or Kiwanis then he likely will be expelled and if he is a church guy.......

I would suggest that this man had no idea that he was predisposed to child pornography until he go onto the internet. As his lawyer said, "he was like moth attracted to a light bulb". Suddenly he was presented with a light bulb called internet pornography which ignited a character defect that he didn't know was there. From then on it was a spiral to destruction.

If he had just had a wall between him and these sites then he would be a free man today, reputation and job intact...

I am trying to be that voice, that guy  swinging the lamp in front of the driver crying , The bridge is out! The bridge is out" warning that destruction is awaiting those travelling diwn this particular road. I hope someone hears.


WWW.WISECHOICE.NET

Read more: http://www.leaderpost.com/news/Jail+term+Regina+over+child+porn/5805515/story.html#ixzz1ffc3D0EI